Life takes us in many different directions. there are times when we really do bite off more than we can chew. I have a friend who has a job that is way more than full time, he has a very active life outside of work, and he has on going contract writing gigs. There are many times he gets way to much on his plate to handle and that is before he tries to have a love life. Not a place I like to be in my self but I am starting to get that way.
having a love life is like having a garden. it requires care an attention if it is to grow. Not only do I have one garden to worry about growing I have two; both women need care and attention dedicated to them and them alone. I am not good at it, I am better with my good girl as she lives with me, my independent woman does not always get my attention as I am easily distracted and she is not around to be in the front of my mind as often as she should be. this means that my good girl does get a large part of my attention when I am not working or involved with other things. But as I work deep nights and usually waiting for something to happen my independent woman gets to visit me at my work. Generally this is here time except when work interrupts. Some times work does interrupt more often than normal and my independent woman gets put on the back burner for awhile. When I have bad work nights I try to bring her home so she can get extra attention and I try to balance having both women in the house at the same time. Some times that works and some times it does not. We are still working on that and it will take some time.
outside of the women I also have some hobbies, I am a gamer, I try to work on a personal web pages, create programs, kayaking, scuba diving, off road and some outdoor photography. All of which take a back burner to the women in my life usually. There are times when I get to combine them sometimes; I got a chance to do some good outdoor shoots when I took my good girl to both the zoo and the local botanical gardens, but it is not a common activity. I do miss doing these things some times but I feel bad for taking time out for myself. I know that I should actually have my own time and I try to take bits and pieces when I can but things do get pushed aside. I need to balance things better in my own life.
Right now I need to study for certification test it is actually putting all the other hobbies computer related to the back burner if not off the stove completely. This test is important for furthering my career and could mean the difference from going on full time and staying a contractor. I can steal bits and pieces of time to study but I seldom spend a lot of time doing it. It comes from wanting to spend time with the woman and really not being in the right mood to study. I do study better at work but that is also when I try to give my independent woman her time with me. As I think about what to do to give both women my time is to make it so they are both there when I am not at work. That would put my work time mine alone again and I could do my things during work. I am not sure my good girl is ready for this so I am not going to ask right now but i need to do something to get this test out of the way. If i can not figure this out, how is school going to work when I go for my master's degree next year sometime?
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